Aspire rather to be a hero than merely appear one.
- Baltasar Gracian, Spanish Philosopher and Writer (1601-1658)
Thanks for the props on 100 posts, that means a lot to me! Sorry for the harrowing phone call. You’re a good friend, Billy. For you to care about me as a friend and for me to test you and put you through that is unfair, but I can only tell you that I can only handle sobriety and sanity for so long before I get this itching feeling that I want to unshackle myself from the straight and narrow and play some more games on the slippery slope to madness. It’s something I enjoy. It’s been that way since I realized that all my favorite movie characters were the lovable losers, since I realized that all my favorite musicians and artists were the ones that committed suicide in one way or another, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix, Jaco Pastorius, Ian Curtis, even a guy as stoic and manly as Ernest Hemingway, not a guy to sit his ass on the pity pot, that guy put a shotgun in his mouth and pulled the trigger. And I love that about him because he chose the time and place of his own death. And I know you have issues with your dad, and I want to kiss you and hold you in the most non-homosexual way but just tell you I’m sorry for the nightmares that you had over that, but your buddy Mike, there is no fucking way that old age is going to get me, my friend, I am going to do some shit, and then get some more shit done, and then I will chose the time and place of my death as well.