Gather ye rose-buds while ye may, Old Time is still a-flying: And this same flower that smiles today, Tomorrow will be dying.
- Robert Herrick, English Poet (1591-1674)
10. The protestors of Occupy Wall Street will get a free education in seeing what happens when the one-percent no longer gives a shit and no longer chooses to fund the welfare state while being cast as villains.
9. For sociologists, Obama’s reelection provides a unique opportunity to witness the curious phenomenon of liberals who once took such great pride in questioning authority now imploring us all to shut-up and obey our masters.
8. The movie “Idiocracy,” once regarded a somewhat obscure comedy, will finally be hailed as a prophetic vision of the future and the true work of genius that it is.
7. We have now been diagnosed, which is the first step in seeking treatment. America has chosen to double-down on the failed policies which brought us four years of rising unemployment and crippling deficits. If the definition of insanity is said to be “doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results,” then we can now diagnose America as clinically insane.
6. In successfully campaigning to reelect the president, the old media gets a lot of the credit at the cost of all of their credibility. After spending every last dime of their credibility, they may have hastened their own extinction, but at least they can take solace in this – with no more need to campaign for Obama, they can treat him just like a child treats a toy they’ve grown bored of and spend the next four years taking him apart.
5. Barack Obama once mocked the idea of American Exceptionalism by saying, “I believe in American exceptionalism, just as I suspect that the Brits believe in British exceptionalism and the Greeks believe in Greek exceptionalism.” For too long America has been subject to the undue burdens of being the last great hope for freedom in the world. Now Obama and those of his ilk have all the opportunity they need to make America completely unexceptional. Enjoy the newfound lack of responsibility that comes being unexceptional, America!
4. Obama got what he wished for in winning a second term as president. Defining moments from our last four two-termers include Katrina, Impeachment, Iran-Contra and Watergate. While it’s too late to warn Obama to be careful what he wishes for, at least we can say, enjoy it while it lasts.
3. While readers themselves ranked Atlas Shrugged as the greatest book of all time, most literary critics despise the book. With Obama reelected, we no longer have to read through an 1,100 page book to see what happens to America when the masses elect the Marxists and the looting runs rampant.
2. The most famous book written on the Roman Empire is Gibbon’s “Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire.” Now historians of today can witness firsthand the most famous period in our history.
1. Those lucky enough to have been alive when America was the most prosperous nation on Earth can enjoy the looks of disbelief on their grandchildren’s faces when they tell them the stories of how things were back before America joined the third world.